Gosh, you are so beaufitul... to me.

she was standing right before me, again.. after quite some times we've never met each other. the one that I can't deny that i could never stop missing her. 

since the day we made mistake, which is.. saying to love each other (something that "I" should have said a long long time before), then another and another mistakes we made, we end up to come round that we should have not done it. that we, obviously, were not meant to be together.. that we are already have our own life.. that we had to say good bye, whether we like it or not!




i dunno who started it actually, but, what i know is that she was standing in front of me. the same old 'her'.. with the eyes that I could never forgot.. the face that i always can describe precisely, inch by inch... the smile that it used to be all i care to see.. the whole her that i trembling cant stand wanting to hold her in my arm every time i close my eyes and paint of her in my mind..


now she was there with her brand new hair style that makes her seems so fresh and make me crush on her for a thousand times.. i wish i could have a gut to take her fingers in my hand and grab her wherever i want.. wherever i can.. just to kill this pain in longing for her. 

i wish i could make the world stop from its rotation, make the clock stop ticking, and make all people freezing so i can take her down into my hug without feeling guilty.. no need to anxiousness cos there are only me and her in this frozen world, in this static dimension. i wish i could hold her cos i miss her so much at that time and the million times before.


but all i could do is just staring at her, spread an unclearly smile and a flatten word sounds..   

Hi...

while my mind shouting out loud... 'Gosh, you are so beautiful. you always beautiful to me, lovey'..  but, those words spoken only in my mind. 

cos she doesn't have to know that.. 

i am still loving her. 

after all, i promised myself not to let her know what i feel about her, again. ever!


Gosh, you are so beaufitul... to me.